The Hustle of Sistah Ant

Tomorrow I smile. 

Last August, I set aside $25 from the interest earned by my Emergency Fund so that I could start a home down payment fund in its own account.  The growth of this new account was slow going, but I figured that if I was disciplined, just maybe I would be able to put together about ten thousand dollars by October 2008.  I decided to be ambitious.  I tacked another three thousand onto that goal, because I didn’t want to set the bar too low.  Besides, after looking at the market, I figured that ten thousand wouldn’t be enough.  I set up automatic deposits through payroll and looked forward to paying off credit card debt so that I could save more aggressively.  Then I was laid off.  Then I got a job.  Long story short, blah blah blah, tomorrow I meet my thirteen thousand dollar savings goal.  I will smile.

After tomorrow, I will fuss. 

I will knit my brow and purse my lips as I make another estimate of how much money I’ll need for the house.  As I’ve already discussed before, things have changed since I made my initial estimate.  I already know I want to increase my emergency fund by about four thousand dollars.  But I think, based on more intense scrutiny of home prices, local taxes and other various fees, that it would be an excellent idea to increase the amount of the down payment/closing costs fund.  I am willing to use some of the emergency fund to help with the house, within reason and depending on the circumstances, but using the overwhelming majority of the emergency fund is completely out of consideration.  I must save more.  Thousands more.  It is not fun to rain on your own parade, but that is the responsible thing to do.  However, I am not going to ruin tomorrow.  It is my day to celebrate meeting a lofty goal early.

I can fuss later.

The more I look at houses and mortgage calculators, the more I realize that the amount I had in mind for a down payment and closing costs and emergency fund is too low, if I want to have the kind of security I want to have going into the mortage.  I could press forward with what I have, but I would feel better if I had more money to work with.  I’d rather overestimate than underestimate.

I am talking myself out of being disappointed.  

Actually this is cause for joy.  It’s better to know this now than later.  

On another note, I’m looking forward to further career development.   I’m working on a volunteer project that will: 1) help someone in need, 2) give me valuable experience, 3) help me network with other like minded colleagues.  I’m still waiting to hear back on the interview I had, but I can expect to wait a little longer before hearing back.  I’m consistently looking at the market, but it’s tight right now - all the more reason for me to believe that this job I’m waiting to hear from has my name written on it.  Often, the good things come with a little patience.

All I can think about lately is the house.  I talked about it so much over the weekend that Mister Ant had to ask me to chill out.  And he’s a very tolerant and patient man.  (He has to be, to be with me.) 

I have a set of bookmarked tabs set up in my internet browser.  The first is at one of those sites where you can browse houses for sale.  Another is a zip code map of my area, so that I can browse for homes by zip code.  Another tab is the site for the local transportation authority, so that I can see whether or not a house I’m looking at is close to public transportation - which is an important dealbreaker for me.  Yet another tab links to a crime statistics site, so that I can see where the homicides for the last two years have been in relation to the homes I’m browsing.  One more tab (and I know this may be controversial) shows the racial makeup of the areas in the city.  I want to live in as diverse a neighborhood as I can afford.

I’ve been looking at these different sites, getting a feel for the city.  I’ve also been getting lost on purpose in the city - it’s a great way to learn!  It’s still too early to call a realtor, but I am looking more seriously for first-time homeowner counseling.  I’m so excited!

The last time I had a big money goal, it was to pay off the last of my old credit card debt.  I worked on it for many months.  Sacrificed for it, planned for it… scribbled on the backs of countless envelopes…  I came so very, very close.  I had even started to save a little bit of money from each paycheck towards My Own Home.  And then I was laid off from my job. 

I didn’t panic, even though part of me wanted to do exactly that.  Instead, I took my entire severance pay and put it into the My Own Home account, but I didn’t do it with a lot of enthusiasm.  I figured that since I wasn’t employed, there wasn’t any point in getting too attached to the money, because financial need might make me have to raid the account.  In case you were wondering, that’s why I put the word "tentative" next to this blog’s My Own Home progress bar.

Here I am, seven months later, making more money as a temporary employee than I’ve ever made before, and saving at a faster rate than I ever anticipated before I was laid off.  I am blessed.  Today, I am 94% of the way towards my down payment goal, and given my prospects at work, I can reasonably anticipate that I will meet my goal by the end of this month, enabling me to move on to beefing up my Emergency Fund.  I am in awe - I’m on the cusp!

But I did have these fleeting thoughts:  What if my project ends earlier than I think it will?   What if I have to dip into my savings?  Last time I got soooo close without actually finishing - what if it happens again?  Maybe I shouldn’t get my hopes up too high, too fast.

Guess what?  I can’t afford to do this to myself.  I have to stay positive and not get pushed around by fear.  When I was laid off, I wasn’t able to pay off the last of that debt for another two months, but that wait didn’t kill me!  When it was all said and done, I did eventually reach my goal.  If for some reason I’m not able to save any more for a while, I’m still 94% of the way there.  And even if I wind up having to dip into the account, it can be replenished when (not if) I’m able.  What’s to fear?  Only a negative attitude.

I’m just going to continue to push and push enthusiastically until that progress bar gets all the way over to 100%!  That’s where my head is at.  And that’s where I’m going to keep it.

Last night I sat down with my receipts and added up my trip costs, balanced my checkbook, and made a plan for today’s paycheck.  Everything is doing just fine!  I have a tendency to get a little nervous when I haven’t crunched my numbers in a few too many days, so I was nervous about how my balance would come out when I finally sat down at the table with the receipts.

I did spend $50 dollars more than I had planned on spending on the trip - it was the second tour on my New Orleans trip that put me over the edge.  But, seeing as how I left myself a buffer in my general spending account, that extra $50 didn’t put me in the poorhouse.  In fact, so far as paying bills and saving for the house are concerned, I’m not even breaking my stride.  But when I was on the trip, away from home, not checking my bank balances on the internet, and not sitting still long enough to go through my receipts, I was dependent on a loose tally I was keeping in my head.  I thought I was doing worse than I actually was, and that kept me just scared enough to keep from spending too much more money when I thought I was running low.  There’s still some cash in my trip spending account.

I am not advocating this approach to personal finance.  I think that it’s better when someone knows what their balances actually are so that they can make informed spending/cash flow decisions.  Mind games are not the way to plan.  But I recognize that there are certain circumstances (like when someone is traveling) that make it less likely that someone will keep up with every penny, even though they may find themselves in decision-making positions.  I think it’s better, when your information is limited, to err on the side of caution instead of throwing caution to the wind and spending too much.

Anyway, I’m back on the grind.  I’ve still got a house to save for.  I still haven’t invested my Sharebuilder money. And, I need to figure out what purpose I want to bestow on the balance left in my New Orleans spending account.  Perhaps it should be the seed money for Christmas?  It’s about that time to start saving if I don’t want to go into debt around the time of the holidays…  I’ll keep thinking about it.

First, my toes are cute!  Pedicures tickle.  But it’s okay, I can always use a good laugh.  One thing though - I would rather get cocoa butter than cheap lotion.  This is the second time I’ve paid someone money to pamper my feet, and this is the second time I’ve been disappointed with the moisturizer.  Should I bring my own?  Shoot, should I have to?  This is why I’m glad for my frugality sometimes - I could have done as good a job myself.  But I’m glad I could afford this pedicure, because I really didn’t want to take the time to do the job myself.  (Is this what "I’ve got more money than time means?"  Ooohhhhh…)

Second, I am so proud of Serenity - Please check out her blog, she is living my dream right now and is such an inspiration.

Third, I am not surprised that Starbucks has to scale down.  People are probably spending their latte money on gas.  I’m happy to not have to spend my money on either nowadays.

Yes this is a lazy post, but guess what? I’m having a lazy week.  I have earned it.  This week I am pretending to be a woman of financial means by playing the role of the princess - pedicure, massage, vacation, nice hotel…  I’ll go back to being a hardworking, distracted-by-reality, hustling-to-get-ahead peon next week.

Mama Ant and I were talking about something that someone I know is going to buy.  She balked when I told her that they were going to wait until they had enough money to pay for it outright, and I agreed with that plan.  She said it would take forever to get it that way - why would they wait?  They could just get a decent down payment together and then the payments wouldn’t even be that high.  Before you know it, it would be paid off.

Wow.  I felt like we were speaking two different languages.

Don’t get me wrong - I think that credit can be a very good and useful thing.  I’m using it to pay for my education, my car, and I’ll soon have a mortgage of my own.  But those are pretty much the only things I think I really need to pay for over time, and I’m using "need" very loosely.  In fact, I told my mom last night about my plan to finish paying for my current car ahead of schedule and to pay for my next car without financing.  I also told Mama Ant that I anticipate not relying on credit to furnish My Own Home, and she listened patiently and approvingly.  But I think, from the tone in her voice over the phone, that she thinks I’m just being ‘extra’.

I explained my reasoning.  There have been times when I’ve been unemployed, and one of my principal concerns was how to keep up with at least the minimum payments on my credit card balances.  I never want to have that question again.  Also, I never want to stay in a job situation I don’t like because it would be too difficult to sustain my debt load.  It just makes too much sense to me to avoid debt and avoid having monthly payments as much as possible.  I love the way it feels to know at the end of each month that there is absolutely no balance on any of my credit cards.  Mama Ant could relate to that, but she said that she’s cleaned her cards off only to (seemingly inevitably) load them back up again.    At this point in the conversation, I felt like I was trying to convert a lost soul.

My mom is not a crazy person.  She is not stupid.  She even has her reservations about debt, and she’s no slouch when it comes to fiscal responsibility.   Yet I fear that she is far too comfortable with the idea of "Buy now, pay later."  It is as if "Save now, buy later" is no longer acceptable to her.  Why delay your gratification?  I don’t think that it’s a coincidence that I spent the first ten years of my adult life under the shadow of credit-card debt balances.  I’m not blaming my debt on my parents… but perhaps I got into some of that debt because of an aversion to delayed gratification that could very possibly have been learned at home.  I don’t know.  But to see my mom go towards her golden years with this attitude and hardly any retirement savings is simultaneously sobering and frightening.

I am putting an end to the indecision about the fate of my stimulus check.  I am tired of thinking about it, and I want it out of my hands.  First, the poll results (click here) were mostly in favor of putting the money in the My Own Home account.  You guys really know my passion!  A large part of you were split evenly between keeping the money around in case I need it and investing with Sharebuilder for the first time.  But I listened to the comments as well. 

Since I received my check last night, I made my decision last night.

• Half of the money is going to the My Own Home account.
• A third of it is going to start my very own Sharebuilder account.
• The remainder is going to help people who are not doing as well as I’m doing financially.

Thanks for all your help!

…One more thing - wish me well, please?  I’ve got a job interview today!

I don’t speak French, but I can at least count to ten (with horrible pronunciation) and I know trois is three.  This is the third time I’ve had a ten thousand dollar milestone to share on the blog.  The first time, I’d managed to move my net worth ten thousand dollars higher.  The next time, I had increased my cash assets by over ten thousand dollars since the time I’d started this blog. 

This time is the most exciting for me by far.

There’s exactly ten thousand dollars in my My Own Home savings account right now!

I’ve still got to save another $3,000 to get enough down payment to feel comfortable putting on a home, and I’ve still got to beef up my emergency fund so that when I write the big check for My Own Home, I won’t be without a savings (see my new progress bar?).  However, this is a momentous occasion for me - I have never had a five-figure account balance before.  This is even my first time saving over $1,000 without the help of a student aid disbursement or a severance check.

This is nice - and I should be able to save even more as the month wears on. 

I don’t know how much damage I did over the weekend, but I’m about to find out.  You’d think that with heat indexes hovering around 100, I wouldn’t go anywhere to shop for anything.  I started out pretty well - on Friday, all I did was buy lunch (because I forgot it at home) and pick up a prescription (I bought the medicine now, while I still have insurance and can get away with just paying the co-pay amount.).  The next day, I stayed at home and cleaned my house.  It took all day, because I had to keep stopping in order to rest and drink water (we don’t have an air conditioner), and I’m still not quite finished.  So, on Saturday I didn’t spend any money at all.

Sunday was the day I got in trouble.  Now, let me preface this by saying that I already intended to pick up some clothes/shoes for my trip to New Orleans next month.  I know that you don’t need new clothes for travel - but I want them.  This is an important vacation for me - I haven’t taken a vacation as an adult.  Ever.  Going to Florida for a weekend to see my sorority sister get married does not count.  Neither does hitching a ride to a sorority conference with fifty dollars in my pocket that was supposed to last a week.  Each time, my actions were determined at the whim of other people - that is not a vacation.  But this time, I am going on my own dime and the trip is already paid for.  The concert tickets are paid for.  And I have money saved for spending on the trip already.  I get to do what I want when I want, this time.  I want to enjoy every aspect of this, my first and only vacation as a single woman.  I deserve it - I’ve got no credit card debt and I’m 75% of the way towards having my house down payment - I’ve been good.  I have no idea when my next vacation will be so I’m treating myself - new clothes, eating out, souvenirs for friends - the whole bit, not that scraping by I’ve done every other time I’ve ventured away from home.  (Can you tell I’m trying to convince myself just as much as I’m defending my actions to you?)

That’s why, when I went to the Odunde festival on Sunday, I bought two irresistible wrap skirts, a pair of earrings, and a necklace for a grand total of $65.   That’s not a big deal, per se, but $50 came out of my New Orleans spending account, and I’m wondering if I can replenish it so I’ll have more to spend there next month.   The other $15 for jewelry, plus the prescription amount, $35, came out of my general spending account.  I still haven’t bought groceries yet.  And I only have a 1/4 tank of gas because I never did fill back up when I came home from last week’s roadtrip to my folks’ house.  This week’s allowance was $160.  I think I’ll make it until payday, but I was hoping to keep most of the money in the account so that I’ll have a jump on next week’s expenses.

I’m really just tripping.  I can afford this spending.  I’m just not used to it.  I’m so used to being tight with my money that it feels like every little penny I spend will break me.  I keep forgetting I have safety nets - an emergency fund, unemployment insurance, my My Own Home fund.  It’s because I’m used to playing it safe, hedging bets, talking myself out of buying stuff.  I have totally indoctrinated myself into frugality, and all this spending just makes me nervous.  I thought I was supposed to enjoy the experience of affording and taking a vacation?