dad’s advice
My dad wanted to know why I’m at home every time they hear from me. It’s not because I’m on a landline phone, because I only have a cell phone. It’s because I am cheap. And lazy. I used to go out and have fun two or three weeknights out of a week before hanging out all weekend. That was a phase I went through after realizing that I’d spent 19 years out of my mid-twenties life in school, and it was high time I started to enjoy myself. I became a social butterfly, and it was wonderful. But it cost more money to live that life than the life I’m living now. I had to go shopping more often for casual clothes and accessories (which I couldn’t even put on double-duty by wearing the same clothes to work). I always had to cough up five dollars here and ten dollars there. I had to pay for more gas.
Then, I fell in love and started going out less because me and my honey were too busy making googly-eyes at each other. My social whirlwind didn’t stop, but it slowed down. In this slower time, I had the time to realize that I needed to take drastic action to improve my finances, and then, some things changed. I started to pay attention to where my money was going, even more than I had before. I decided to spend time on furthering my career to boost my earning potential, which meant studying all night after work. Eventually, my social life became talking on the phone and seeing folks in passing. I don’t even have the same desire that I once had to be where everything is happening so that I wouldn’t miss anything. My focus has shifted to the grown-up task of laying a foundation for the kind of life where $20 at the door wouldn’t phase me.
My dad is urging me to stop and smell the roses - spend more time enjoying life, go see and explore new things, and enjoy life before motherhood and age make it more difficult to get it in. Museums. Plays. Travel. Live performances. I agree with him. But first - let me accomplish a few milestones, so that I can let loose guilt free. I have vowed to myself to get my passport application in by the end of this year. Okay, that’s a long time. Maybe by Thanksgiving, instead. And, maybe after I pay off the old credit card debt, I’ll create a spending account that I can use for smelling the roses. I like that idea.
We’ll see if I follow through. There’s something about watching my net worth go up that I love. And I never have really done a lot, or gone anywhere, and I find it hard to pine for something I’ve been doing fine without for so long. But I told my dad I’d make an effort - I know he’s right. Time will tell how great that effort will be and how it will pay off.
